You are most correct…

As always. But it is not what I mean. I know all these things, and that is why I won’t fail. In the end. There will be trial and tribulation, there will be failure and loss. Such is the path we all walk, it is how we evolve, it is how we better ourselves for the next time. But knowing that, in the end, I intend to succeed.

I think a lot of people get me wrong on that, and perhaps it is simply difficult to understand these things when you do not think them yourself, but I have failed before, and I will fail again, of that I am sure. But this knowledge makes me sure I will be victorious in the greatest game there is, life. How to win you ask? By pursuing your dreams and goals with a pure mind and a true heart, by reckognising that all the things we experience in life is a part of what makes us us. By believing that it is possible to be free, completely free, and by choosing to live like your heart wants you to. So that when brother death comes for you a late winter night in many many years, you can say that you would not have anything changed. Even the really bad things. If you can do that, you have won the greatest prize.

Be free and cruel. Really.

just anotHer Person

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No doubt … you are

I don’t know why, but we never thought you were gone anyway. I know you are still here and I cannot see why you should not be. But maybe you felt like fading away – I don’t know.

When it comes to games and wining, then we have different ways to think about it. And we did have quite a few discussions about that matter over the past years. Losing is not an option. Never – no matter in which case, no matter where and what about. I think this is something that you cannot reach in the end. The world forces certain rules upon us and we have to follow certain ways of playing the game. And sometimes this causes us to lose – if we want to or not. There are some rules that we cannot bend and this may cause us to lose in one way or another. But if we only look at how to get around a possible failure and a possible loss then this for me is cheating a bit. Losing makes us stronger for new adventures, makes us better human beings. At least the lessons we learn from losing do. We learn to accept that we are not impeccable. Nobody can be the absolute human, the one that never fails and never loses. There will always be someone in the world who is better than us in one way or another. There will be people that are better programmers, there will be people that are better designers and better directors. There are more talented people out there and there are people out there that reach things we always wanted to reach before us. But if we can accept that this is the case, then we are free enough to go about what we do with the passion for the subject and not for competitive reasons. Then we create really great things and what we do then might be much better than the stuff the other people do, because it was created for the right reasons. Competition can and will break you down at some point, because to compete against each and everyone all the time in all situations in life is a competition that you cannot win, ever. No matter how much you want it.

This does not mean that we should not strive to be good and perhaps the best at what we do. But to keep in mind that there will be someone at some point who is better is very healthy. And in the end, which scale do you use to measure failure and loss..?

I am still here!

It was something Eyal said, and I am not even sure he realised, but clever and true as always. And thoughtfull… Not my best post, not my most clever post and certainly not my most intelligent post. But perhaps the post with the most truth summed up in a very small number of words.

You know what? I am still here. I am still standing and I am still speaking. You know how we always make silly comments about my attitude towards games and how I really don’t like loosing? You know what? When it really matters, when it comes down to the stuff that really makes a difference, in life and in the world, I mean it one hundred percent! I have no intention of loosing. Not now, not never. If you can’t win, you’re either playing with the wrong rules or you’re playing the wrong game. Pick the fights when you need to, but stage them so you can win!

I am still here!

go aHead, make my day, Punk!

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We will all miss the Lodge

Initially I wanted to post something here for a while now. It took me quite some time to finish it and I thought today would be the right time to publish it here. Unfortunately the cleaning and throwing away action that I had going over the last two weeks seems to have extended onto my computer as well and I realised I deleted the files. So I will go back over it next week again and post it then…

Hans’ post links up to a post I made quite a while ago, when I said the Lodge would always be our home. All you said is true Hans. And we will miss the Lodge as much as you do. In fact, I miss it already now. I will miss my room especially as it feels this is the first time ever that the room actually reflects my personality. I don’t know why, but when I come into my room, I feel like coming home to myself. So I will miss this a lot, especially in the first weeks.

And I think it is a mixture of memory and the physical structure as well. We got tied to this because the physical building did not only provide us with room and shelter, it also is the container in which all our good memories have their origin. It would be interesting if the building could actually speak and tell its story. Imagine what it already saw over the past years! It would be an interesting story to read…

Well, the last boxes are packed and on Friday the last two members of the BLS will leave this home. This time it is forever. We won’t come back and will have to find a new home somewhere else. It might be difficult at first, but now we know it is possible – anywhere. The time here in the Lodge, at LIPA and in Liverpool changed us and this change will help us in the future. We are different to when we arrived a little less than three years ago. I think one of the most important things we all learned over the last months is, that we did change. And not everything we originally thought important actually is that important. Priorities changed and directions as well. I am certain that each and everyone of us now walks a bit of a different path than we thought at the start. Maybe the destination changed, maybe it remained the same but the path changed or maybe we walk it with someone else at our side. The last months were marked by the changes and I am certain the coming months will be as well. We don’t know the future and we can only walk open minded and open hearted towards the unknown. With a clear destination in mind. And maybe we end up somewhere we never thought we would, but it turns out to be exactly right…

What makes home home?

What is a home? What makes you feel home?

Is it the furniture? Is it the history you share with the rooms and the walls? Is it simply because you have decorated it yourself and it feels like you? or is it the memories of having shared it with good people on countless occasions where the world have seemed to be perfect for just a handfull of moments?

I am asking this because I think I am discovering some important aspects of what home means now… I am home, where my family is and where I grew up, but still, it is only home because of what was and not so much what will be. This home will always have a certain history to it and because I no longer live here, it will never go beyond that. The lodge was, and still is, even though I can not call it home anymore, a symbol of what can be. The lodge is where we got together, where we lay our plans, where we had our first long conversations into the night, the lodge is not where we met, but it is where we became friends. Somehow, I guess the lodge will always be home.

I will always remember going to bed with the sunrise and still knowing the comming day would bring nothing but good things. I will always remember getting up in the morning, cooking some form of breakfast with what little we could piece together, as we kinda forgot to go shopping for more thant 2 people. All  of us, sitting there, around the long table in the dining room, you, my friends, our friends, together in the house we call the lodge.

That house holds so many great memories, so many good thoughts and so much promise of the future we will have, that it will always be home. My only prayer this night is that whomever inherits our dear Brookfield Lodge, they take good care of it. It was a good home.

Who would have thought, me, Hans, so affectionatly tied to a building? Perhaps I am not, perhaps I am only tied to the memory of the building. I guess that will have to suffice for now. It’s all I’ve got.

tHe door will always be oPen

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A report from the land of Norway.

As Eyal calls it… At the moment, it’s nice to be home again and to enjoy just having some days off. Although I’m kinda working with different things here and there every day, it’s not really consuming a lot of time. I just thought I should share some of the good moments mr. Kant and myself have been having recently… (he’s a bit of a party animal)

Here you go, mr. Kant and Mr. Daniels together again!

That will be all for now I think. More to follow from BLS-1.

Having good times with good People

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